The Greatest Show On Earth
It was the height of the summer in Uppenshaw Down,
And the annual event had once more come around,
For each girl and boy,
There was no greater joy,
Than the day Marvo’s circus would roll into town.
With the big top erect came the opening night,
And parades brought the crowds rolling in,
First on was a clown.
Then the spotlight came down,
And the Ringmaster entered the ring.
And now, he announced, with his megaphone raised,
The Great Ditalini, The Master of Dare…
To provide you with frights,
He will brave untold heights,
And swing from the top of that ladder up there.
At this point a hush fell upon open mouths,
As the crowd began holding their breath,
Then with one mighty swing,
Like a bird on the wing,
He came plummeting down to his death.
Well the crowd were all stunned by the horror they’d seen,
As he lay there, face down on the ground,
Then the silence was broke,
When a clown dared to joke,
Of it being a great leap for mankind.
But the show must go on, the Ringmaster said,
As they dragged Ditalini away,
The Human Cannonball,
Will astound one and all,
Be amazed as he passes this way.
His name, he proclaimed, is “The Bullet,”
And his bravery is something quite rare,
Your hearts he will win,
As he glides ‘cross the ring,
And lands in that net over there.
With their voices restored, the crowd were enthralled,
As into the barrel he got,
Then without much delay,
The short fuse fizzed away,
And ‘The Bullet’ was off like a shot.
Well the act was all over in seconds,
In a direction that wasn’t quite meant,
For as the crowd cheered,
“The Bullet” disappeared,
Through a hole in the top of the tent.
Once more forward stepped the Ringmaster,
And announced to all those taking note,
That there’d been a slight hitch,
And that life was a bitch,
And explained after clearing his throat.
The Strongman has got a pulled muscle,
And the horse has come down with a cough,
The lion’s cage door,
Doesn’t lock anymore,
So unfortunately the Chimp act is off.
As for me, my wife has just left me,
For a man some years younger than I,
I’m dejected and sad,
And I know my health’s bad,
Times like this I just feel I could cry.
Well the crowd filtered out disillusioned,
Some folk in tears and irate,
Not even a trace,
Of a smile on one’s face,
Least of all on Marvo’s the great.
That day will live in the memory,
Of everyone in Uppenshaw Down,
Each filled with remorse,
Till next year, of course,
When once more Marvo rolls into town.
And the annual event had once more come around,
For each girl and boy,
There was no greater joy,
Than the day Marvo’s circus would roll into town.
With the big top erect came the opening night,
And parades brought the crowds rolling in,
First on was a clown.
Then the spotlight came down,
And the Ringmaster entered the ring.
And now, he announced, with his megaphone raised,
The Great Ditalini, The Master of Dare…
To provide you with frights,
He will brave untold heights,
And swing from the top of that ladder up there.
At this point a hush fell upon open mouths,
As the crowd began holding their breath,
Then with one mighty swing,
Like a bird on the wing,
He came plummeting down to his death.
Well the crowd were all stunned by the horror they’d seen,
As he lay there, face down on the ground,
Then the silence was broke,
When a clown dared to joke,
Of it being a great leap for mankind.
But the show must go on, the Ringmaster said,
As they dragged Ditalini away,
The Human Cannonball,
Will astound one and all,
Be amazed as he passes this way.
His name, he proclaimed, is “The Bullet,”
And his bravery is something quite rare,
Your hearts he will win,
As he glides ‘cross the ring,
And lands in that net over there.
With their voices restored, the crowd were enthralled,
As into the barrel he got,
Then without much delay,
The short fuse fizzed away,
And ‘The Bullet’ was off like a shot.
Well the act was all over in seconds,
In a direction that wasn’t quite meant,
For as the crowd cheered,
“The Bullet” disappeared,
Through a hole in the top of the tent.
Once more forward stepped the Ringmaster,
And announced to all those taking note,
That there’d been a slight hitch,
And that life was a bitch,
And explained after clearing his throat.
The Strongman has got a pulled muscle,
And the horse has come down with a cough,
The lion’s cage door,
Doesn’t lock anymore,
So unfortunately the Chimp act is off.
As for me, my wife has just left me,
For a man some years younger than I,
I’m dejected and sad,
And I know my health’s bad,
Times like this I just feel I could cry.
Well the crowd filtered out disillusioned,
Some folk in tears and irate,
Not even a trace,
Of a smile on one’s face,
Least of all on Marvo’s the great.
That day will live in the memory,
Of everyone in Uppenshaw Down,
Each filled with remorse,
Till next year, of course,
When once more Marvo rolls into town.
