THE LITERARY WORLD OF THOMAS DADE
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    • POPE Thanks Granny D
    • Necrophilia - Fifty Shades of Grey
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    • Letter to Auntie Kath
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    • Letter from Her Majesty
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  • Restaurant Reviews
    • Generous Pioneer, Ilkley
    • Fazenda, Leeds
    • Amici Ristorante, Keighley
    • Balti House, Keighley
    • The Toby Carvery, Keighley
    • Banny's Fish & Chip Restaurant, Colne
    • Kingfisher Restaurant, Cross Hills
    • Ivy Palace Cantonese, Colne
    • Mother Hubbards, Scarborough
    • Princess Cafe, Scarborough
    • Welcome Inne, Scarborough
    • Leeds Fisheries, Scarborough
  • Feature Length Screenplays
    • You're Not Singing, Eddie Moore - Psychological Thriller
    • the summer of alex white - Romantic Comedy
    • The Grey Room - Psychological Thriller
    • That's Show Business! Comedy
    • The Eartly World of Francis Wick - Comedy
    • On The Slyde - Comedy
  • Six-part Screenplays
    • You're Not Singing, Eddie Moore - Comedy
    • Mardy & Son - Dark Comedy
    • STARS - Comedy
    • Amazing Grace - Comedy
  • Radio Scripts
    • Belvedere Trent - The Circles of Suburbia - Comedy
  • Credits
    • Good for the gander

In her dreams...

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Dear Liz

You certainly came to the right place, dear. Your dream bears all the classic signs that reflect your life at the present time. As you have mentioned, Kate is due any day now and, presumably, at this moment in time you are as in the dark as to the baby’s gender as the rest of us.

You’ve mentioned chasing after a large cat. Well, although you never made it clear in your letter, I’m guessing it may have been a female cat, which is more commonly known as a ‘queen’. As for the giant prawn, should her Majesty be familiar with the local Chinese take-away menu, one would find that it is much more likely to pop up under the heading, ‘King prawn’. So, as it was you who was pursuing the cat and not the other way round, this would be a representation of how desperate you were to uncover the gender of the future monarch and, with the cat choking on the prawn, this undoubtedly signifies your frustration at not being able to predict the outcome.

To be wearing a negligee in your dream indicates your vulnerability. You feel that people can see right through to who you are and your intentions. Dare I suggest you have a secret that you are afraid will be revealed? Not that it’s for me to surmise, of course, but a little bird tells me that you’re considering abdicating in the not too distant future. The sceptre and the key (key to the kingdom) would seem to indicate a handing over of power. Did you notice if the cat had rather large ears, by any chance?


During Kate's labour, Liz, Charles and Camilla witness the moment a surprise contraction forces out a rogue stool

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On the other hand, there is a danger that I could be barking up the wrong tree, being as a cat-fight, a King prawn curry and a negligee are all the ingredients for a lasses night out in Newcastle. I don’t suppose you were covered in vomit, sweating like a pig and had a tattoo of a butterfly on your buttocks by any chance? I’m kidding… the lasses in Newcastle are far classier than that; the butterfly would have been on or around the ankle, it’s in Hartlepool they have it on the arse.

I look forward to chewing the fat with you at your next garden party.

Ich Dien
Granny D

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