Ivy Palace Cantonese Restaurant
78 Albert Road
Colne
Lancashire
BB8 0AG
No dedicated website: http://www.shopincolne.co.uk/ivy_palace.html
August 2012
I have to say, this is far from being the Rolls Royce of Cantonese Restaurants. Due to its small interior, it’s no surprise to find yourself almost rubbing shoulders with your fellow diners; the tables are covered in paper table cloths, which, of course saves on the washing bills but does little to impress; and the single toilet, shared by both sexes, is painted in a garish orange colour that induces dizziness and biliousness combined.
So what about the good points? Well, the Waitresses were quite attractive, and the overall service wasn’t too bad either; not exceptional, but not bad. Ok, now I’m beginning to struggle. On arrival, I had a mineral water. The bottle was room temperature and a couple of ice cubes were used to chill. It might sound a bit picky, but I had to return my drink to the bar after topping up from the bottle because the ice cubes had melted, which wouldn’t have happed had the water been chilled from the bottle.
Being one of a party of five, we were able to sample each others food. Our selections were as follows…
Starters: Crispy butterfly king prawns, salt & pepper king prawns, salt & pepper spare ribs and meat samosas.
Mains: Surf & Turf (fillet steak, king prawns and scallops), fillet steak Cantonese style, chicken and green peppers in black bean sauce and chicken satay, chips and rice.
In all honesty, I wasn’t overly enamoured by any of the food. The salt & pepper spare ribs were like they had been left in the oven to keep warm… for a week! I chewed and discarded two pieces of meat from the surf & turf because it had a slightly weird taste; the garlic sauce that it lay in had no substance and very little flavour, the scallops weren’t worth commenting on, and the chips were an absolute disgrace! Not only were they the frozen variety one might expect from a greasy-spoon café, but they were dark brown and leathery. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that they had been keeping warm next to the salt & pepper spare ribs. Probably the best of it was the fillet steak Cantonese style. It was covered in a thick, rich, sticky barbeque sauce which, although being terribly sweet, was quite nice. I doubt I could have eaten a full main though.
Of course, as with any dining experience, one measures the quality against value. Taking into consideration the mineral water, the pint and three-halves of lemonade and lime, the half-pint of coke and a pint of lager, had the whole meal have come to around £50-£60, the phrase ‘you get what you pay for’ would at least provide an excuse for the poor standard of food. But it wasn’t £50, or £60; it was £91.80. With prices like that, I would have expected the £16 surf & turf to be Shergar with a salmon strapped to its back. It was all too expensive for what it was. Would I recommend it? I think you’ve already guessed the answer to that.
Rating (out of 10): 5
Review by Tom
So what about the good points? Well, the Waitresses were quite attractive, and the overall service wasn’t too bad either; not exceptional, but not bad. Ok, now I’m beginning to struggle. On arrival, I had a mineral water. The bottle was room temperature and a couple of ice cubes were used to chill. It might sound a bit picky, but I had to return my drink to the bar after topping up from the bottle because the ice cubes had melted, which wouldn’t have happed had the water been chilled from the bottle.
Being one of a party of five, we were able to sample each others food. Our selections were as follows…
Starters: Crispy butterfly king prawns, salt & pepper king prawns, salt & pepper spare ribs and meat samosas.
Mains: Surf & Turf (fillet steak, king prawns and scallops), fillet steak Cantonese style, chicken and green peppers in black bean sauce and chicken satay, chips and rice.
In all honesty, I wasn’t overly enamoured by any of the food. The salt & pepper spare ribs were like they had been left in the oven to keep warm… for a week! I chewed and discarded two pieces of meat from the surf & turf because it had a slightly weird taste; the garlic sauce that it lay in had no substance and very little flavour, the scallops weren’t worth commenting on, and the chips were an absolute disgrace! Not only were they the frozen variety one might expect from a greasy-spoon café, but they were dark brown and leathery. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that they had been keeping warm next to the salt & pepper spare ribs. Probably the best of it was the fillet steak Cantonese style. It was covered in a thick, rich, sticky barbeque sauce which, although being terribly sweet, was quite nice. I doubt I could have eaten a full main though.
Of course, as with any dining experience, one measures the quality against value. Taking into consideration the mineral water, the pint and three-halves of lemonade and lime, the half-pint of coke and a pint of lager, had the whole meal have come to around £50-£60, the phrase ‘you get what you pay for’ would at least provide an excuse for the poor standard of food. But it wasn’t £50, or £60; it was £91.80. With prices like that, I would have expected the £16 surf & turf to be Shergar with a salmon strapped to its back. It was all too expensive for what it was. Would I recommend it? I think you’ve already guessed the answer to that.
Rating (out of 10): 5
Review by Tom
